It's almost Thanksgiving

but I'm drooling over our summer photos.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

I feared some days would never end,

but then school started and I missed the noise and the chaos.

It was sweet and exhausting.

Lots and lots and lots of togetherness.

We blew bubbles

 and made our own lava lamps with oil, alka seltzer, and food coloring

 picked blackberries

and strawberries 

 and spent a lot of time on Lake Chatuge.

 It's the most beautiful lake this side of the Mississippi,

AND there are no mosquitos.

Don't tell anyone.

We don't need the big city riff raff from Atlanta mucking up the place like they do at Lake Lanier.

Yes, we're Atlantans (Decaturites, really), but we're RELATED to the local mountain folk,
so they let us in.

 After 15 years of seeing signs for Rock City,

I finally SAW ROCK CITY!

Summer is not my favorite season,

I always dread it

and then I miss it.

to be childlike

Mud Party!

This week, I was helping my four-year-old son into his pajamas, when he said, "Look mom, an owl!"

Sitting on a branch just outside our window was a big, beautiful Barred Owl. We called Lilly and Alan into the room and watched with wonder for a minute or two. We even called the neighbors so their toddler could see. At one point, the owl turned its head 90 degrees and looked right at us. It was magical. Jonny was so proud that he was the one who spotted the owl and he told everyone about it. I talked to him about all the things we miss because we don't pay attention and how it felt like God had sent that owl JUST for us :-) He said, "Pwobly God willy DID send that owl to our house. He pwobly wote, 'To Jonathan's house,' on its wing!"

Today in Sunday School we talked about what it means to be childlike. A friend told a story about a recent trip to the grocery store with her three-year-old. On their way back to the car, her daughter noticed a homeless man, disheveled and shoeless, standing in front of the store. She pointed and yelled, "Mommy, that man is Poooooooooor!" Her mom tried to divert her attention and asked her to lower her voice. Instead, she cried out, "But Mommy, he's REALLY Pooooor!! He's not wearing any SHOOOOOOES!" At this point, the man and my friend made eye contact and he asked if she had any food she would share with him. She asked if he liked yogurt and her daughter carefully picked out her favorite yogurt tube flavors to share with the hungry man. He was grateful, but expressed concern that he was taking food from the sweet girl. 

I have so much more to say, but the weather is incredible here today and my kids and I are headed to the park. Here's to being more childlike.

Camping

Last week was fall break and we went camping in Cherokee, North Carolina.

We went to the Cherokee Village where they demonstrated how native americans made tools, baskets, pottery, etc.  We even danced with the Cherokee (that's Lil behind the leader).

We saw Mingo Falls.

We weren't exactly roughing it. The KOA where we stayed had an indoor and an outdoor pool, hot tubs, stocked trout ponds, a bouncy house, playground, food stand, and a store. Alan perfected the art of balancing on a fence :-)

It was pretty great until Friday night when hundreds of families arrived. People are annoying. Annoying and stinky. Suddenly the bathrooms, which had been relatively clean all week, were filthy and smelled like cigarette smoke. There were millions and billions and trillions of kids. We hightailed it out of there Saturday morning.

Peace out!

Stuff and things

Today I volunteered in my son's pre-K class and it was such a huge relief to see him having fun and interacting with his classmates. For the first couple of weeks, I had NO idea what he was doing all day and the boy tells me nothing. His sister has been exploding with details since she learned how to speak. Every day she tells me what her teacher said, who played with whom at recess, which shirt her friend wore, and whose mom packs the best lunches. It's like she got all of the detail genes and left her poor brother speechless. Every now and then, he'll repeat something he heard at school in his best teacher voice, "You write letters TOP to Bottom." This week he came home saying, "barf." He didn't even know what it meant, but he liked the sound of it. I thought school would wear him out, but he's napping every single day. It's so odd having him in school all day. The end of an era. 

I'm so completely grateful to have a few months off to process these changes before applying for jobs. After 8 1/2 years of being with my kids nearly every single day, I deserve a break. That is all. If motherhood were a regular job, I would have had 442 weekends in those 8.5 years, plus at least 16 weeks of vacation. Not to mention, I would have gotten paid. So in 2 years and 6 months, if I still don't have a job, you're allowed to ask me what I do all day. 

In other news, I recently read The Glass Castle and loved every dysfunctional word of it.

Also, my brother's band, Dr Vitamin, released their latest album. It's REALLY good. I'm not biased or anything. Check it out: http://drvitamin.bandcamp.com/

photo by Kenzi Tainow Photography

anxiety

My eight year old has been suffering from terrible anxiety all summer. Snakes are about the only thing she's NOT afraid of. It started in May during the last week of school. The change was so dramatic, you'd think something terrible must have happened, but it was just a series of small events that seemed to trigger it. She had a big dance recital, her friend moved away, she got strep throat, had a run-in with a tree root (I'll let you use your imagination on that one), and was really sad for 2nd grade to end. She's never been big on change and has always been slow to warm up to new experiences, but suddenly her fears began interfering with our daily lives.

This summer has been rough. She hasn't wanted to leave the house, and she's had separation anxiety worse than she ever had as a toddler. While she has always refused sleepovers, now she won't even go on a play date. Her stomach has been hurting since May 20th. 11 very long weeks. We've been to 4 doctors, had a stomach x-ray, and a blood test to check her blood count and to rule out Celiac and Chron's Disease. Physically, she's fine. Now she's seeing a therapist.

I wonder if my parenting is to blame, if I warn her about dangers too often. I'm sure my helicopter parenting is not only a partial cause, but also a reaction to her anxiety. We feed off of each other. When she was younger, I always had to be prepared with a change of shoes, band aids, water, food, and a contingency plan. Her little brother is a more happy-go-lucky, adventurous kid and he doesn't listen to me when I warn him about dangers anyway. He could be bleeding from the knees and not even notice. My goal has always been just to keep him alive. He doesn't require extra shoes.

Then there's heredity, which is definitely not going to do her any favors. Our family tree is riddled with alcoholism and bi-polar disorders with a sprinkle of OCD on top. While my husband and I are both prone to anxiety, we've learned to manage it. I mostly avoid the things that make me nervous, which doesn't exactly make me the most fun person on the universe and isn't probably the healthiest coping technique. It's really sad to see your child avoiding things like amusement parks and Braves games.  Besides, you can't avoid elementary school just because it gives you stomach aches. I had school anxiety in the first grade and according to my mom I cried every day for over a month. Of course, we had just moved for the umpteenth time and my teacher, Mrs. Looney, paddled kids who didn't do their homework.

I now realize that my daughter was wired differently from the start. Oh, I'd heard stories about babies who slept through the night at 5 weeks, but I convinced myself they were just urban legends. When she was a month old, her Dad sneezed and it startled her so badly that she cried for 20 minutes. From then on, he ran out of the room if he had to sneeze, cough, or breathe loudly. When she was little, if a truck hit a pothole in front of our house or the phone rang while she was sleeping, it would startle her awake. The child never napped for more than 20 minutes. She hated riding in cars. She didn't sleep through the night until she was 7 years old. She's terrified of loud toilets, and FORGET IT if they flush on their own.

But she's funny, spunky, graceful, intelligent, talented, and extremely empathetic. School started this week and she was nervous about it for weeks. She cried the night before, but marched right in there like a soldier going to war. She spent the day befriending the new girl in class. Being sensitive is a mixed bag. Parenthood is too.

School days

It's the first day of school. After 8 1/2 years of nearly always having at least one kid by my side, they are both in school until 2:30pm 5 days a week. I'm stunned by the silence. The fridge is so loud. There are so many things I want to do, but don't know where to start. All those years of wishing I could just have 2 or 3 hours to myself. Still, I'm going to wonder what Jonny is doing in pre-K every second of the day. He looked so proud wearing his new orange backpack, and not one of those tiny preschool deals either. Lilly is in 3rd grade. THIRD! Her last year at her K-3 school. I remember driving by the school when she was in preschool and pointing out where she would SOMEDAY go to Kindergarten. Man, I sound so old.

2012 Summer Bucket List

That's right, folks. 4 days and counting until summer vacation. Lil stayed home from school sick today, though I'm not sure how sick she truly was. Perhaps she needed a 'practice' summer vacation day. She and Jonny got along famously, made sea shell necklaces, made a car out of a box, and made our summer bucket list. I feel much less anxious than I have in recent years because Jonathan is no longer napping and we don't have to schedule every single outting around that. I also won't have to entertain Lilly for 3 hours while he sleeps. No, I'm not complaining about a child who took 3 hour naps. I would never do that. Anyhow, here's to summer. I'd like to think we'll get to sleep in, but that's not going to happen. At least I won't have to pack any more lunch boxes. Here's our bucket list:

Walk the dog together in the morning
No tv until afternoon
Buy a treat from the creepy ice cream truck
Go to an IMAX movie (I have free tickets from our museum membership - score!)
Swimming
Braves games
Camping - backyard and at Hard Labor Creek State Park after blueberry picking
Blueberry Picking at Hard Labor Creek
Strawberry Picking at Cottle Strawberry Farm (let me know if you know of a better place)
Lake Chatuge
Play in the rain
Treasure Hunt
Create a drive-in movie theatre with cardboard box cars
Visit Rancho Allegre Farm in Dacula
Tubing
Explore photography with Lilly
Buy a flip camera and let the kids make movies
Movie nights
Catch fireflies
Stargaze - track moon phases and check out summer constellations
Frisbee
Read alouds - The Princess Bride, Harry Potter (yep, we're the last people on Earth)
Make time capsules
Go to Holiday World in Santa Claus, Indiana
Visit Squire Boone Caverns (and most importantly, the Rock Shop)
Write a letter
Paint pet rocks
Take Lilly to a concert
Make homemade henna
Visit Daddy at work
Go to Cochran Mill Nature Center
Calloway Gardens butterfly house
Atlanta Center for Puppetry Arts
Aquarium
Roller Skate

Stocking stuffer idea

What can I say? The boy loves tape. He went through a 3-pack of scotch tape in one weekend. 

I let him because he was quiet and wasn't breaking anything.

 Then I ordered him his very own set of 11 colored masking tape rolls. I could only find 8 of his rolls for this picture. He has one roll in each pocket and another in his hand at all times.

He has a particular fondness for taping the floor, doorknobs and chairs.

His sister made a kite and he made a ring and a handle for his water bottle.

Here's a frugal holiday gift idea:

A large empty box (which every parent knows is usually played with more than the toy inside),

with a few rolls of colorful tape,

and maybe a large lollipop for good measure.

What more could a kid want?

Chai Tea party

It's been incredibly dreary outside this week, so I tried to cheer myself up by having a tea party with my son. I simmered fennel seeds, sliced ginger, a cinnamon stick, a bay leaf, whole cloves, white peppercorns, and cardamom seeds in 3 cups of water for about 10 minutes. Then I turned off the heat, added 2 English Breakfast tea bags, 2 teaspoons of honey and let it steep another 10 minutes.

 Add 1 1/2 cups of milk

and voila, a delightful pot of chai tea!

My daughter would have dressed up like she was dining at the Ritz.

My son? Jelly on the sleeve and filthy hands.

He lapped up the tea like a dog.

Camping on Deep Creek

Over Lil's fall break, we went camping with Alan's sister, Teresa, and her hubby, John, on Deep Creek in Bryson City, North Carolina. We borrowed this pop-up camper from Alan's other sister, Kendra, and now I'm obsessed with getting one of our own. I have no idea where we'll park it, but I MUST have one. It's very compact when folded up and can easily be pulled by a mid-sized car. You just pop it up, plug it in and hook up the water and you're all set. You can get a good one used for about $3,000

and I have fantasies of popping it up in our backyard and making it a room of my own,

a place to escape to.

We were right on the creek, so we went tubing a couple of times.

Sleeping to the sound of the creek was delightful. Is there anything more relaxing than sitting in front of a camp fire? We weren't exactly roughing it, as my husband so sarcastically reminded me. The campground had a bathroom with showers (and only a few creepy crawly things).

The children were so happy. They were thrilled that they got to eat marshmallows every night! Lilly said I'm nicer to her when we're camping. Isn't that another good reason to buy a pop-up camper?

Quote on parenting

"Remember you are not managing an inconvenience; you are raising a human being."

- Kittie Franz

400 year old trees

When we were on our trip to North Carolina, Alan and I got away for a night to celebrate our 12th anniversary. 

We spent the night at the Freymont Inn in Bryson, City and the next morning went on a hike in the Joyce Kilmer Memorial Forest. It's one of the only old-growth, virgin forests on the east coast. It reminded me very much of a mini-Muir Woods, which was where we were 12 years ago for our honeymoon. 

Twelve years ago, when we were younger, thinner, and more carefree,

but no happier

and no more in love.

Taste a little of the summer

“Taste a little of the summer, taste a little of the summer, my grandma put it all in jars.” That’s a line from a Greg Brown song, Canned Goods, one of my all-time favorites. My grandma used to can the vegetables my grandfather grew in his garden. My husband is a volunteer at Sugar Creek Garden twice a week and has brought home quite a bounty of summer veggies. Cucumbers and tomatoes and okra, oh my!

 I’ve never canned, but should probably learn how. I really don’t cook much over the summer. All I seem to crave is watermelon and peaches. In fact, I could be a raw foodist from June-August if I didn’t have kids and a husband to feed. Wait a minute, raw foodists don’t eat ice cream, do they? Never mind.

Last night, I did cook my favorite braised cabbage recipe and prepared some mac & cheese from a box (gasp). I also tried out this new okra recipe, which was SO easy and deeeeeelicious! Tonight, I have no idea what I’m going to cook. I might cook the same Caponata recipe I made over the weekend so I can use up the eggplant Alan brought home from the garden. I’ll probably buy some bread to spread the caponata on, though last week we just put it on top of nachos, along with some Lemon Feta Dip and hummus. The Decatur Farmer’s Market is this afternoon and Pearson Farm will be selling the last of their Georgia peaches. I’m not sure what else we’ll eat. Maybe ice cream? Let’s see, that’s a veggie, a fruit, a carb, and dairy. Sounds good to me. I can just hear my mom asking, “What about PROTEIN?”

School started back yesterday, which is why I have a moment to blog. The boy is napping (don’t be jealous, he woke up at 5:40 a.m.) and the girl is enjoying the heck out of her first week of school. Who doesn’t love the start of the school year? Brand new school supplies, back-to-school clothes, and classmates. Imagine the possibilities.

We had a lovely summer break and spent lots of time at Lake Chatuge.

Alan picked these wild blackberries while we were there.

Grandma Ashe baked a blackberry cobbler, which I’ll surely dream about all winter.

We hired goats and sheep to eat invasive vegetation behind our church, which was a sight to behold. They ate kudzu and poison ivy like it was chocolate. The company is called EweniversallyGreen and the owner, Brian Cash, can be reached at 678-595-0147.

We must have paid the animals 2 dozen visits while they were there working.
We were sad to see them go.

Jonathan's birthday

July 2nd, 2011

Three years ago, my bald baby boy came barreling into the world on his due date, and I’ve been chasing after him ever since. He’s loud and fast and has a penchant for headbutting. He breaks things just to see how they’re put together. His favorite song is Kick Drum Heart by the Avett Brothers. He has a habit of sticking his bottom out and chanting, “I got my boo bootay,” like he’s in a hip hop video, and I’m sure he’s going to get suspended from preschool for being a bad influence. He adores his big sister and follows her every move. “Every family has a kid who won’t eat,” and in our house, Jonny is that kid. He’ll eat sweets, of course, and especially loved the dirt on his cake. He gets away with a lot because of this smile.

Jonny's first day of preschool

Planting seeds, in more ways than one.

Summerlicious

We're gearing up for summer vacation. This summer I hope to focus on the rhythm of our days. I'd like to give the kids (and myself) something fun to look forward to each week, but also balance busy, physical activities with quiet, creative ones. In my experience, the joy of summer dissipates quickly when you don't build a little structure into your day. Our house is small and tends to feel even smaller when we don't get out of the house before noon. Here's our summer bucket list (so far):

*Invite one of Lil's friends over to make body art with homemade Henna 

*Start a writing club with Lil
*Start Lil's own gratitude journal and "hunt" for gifts to be grateful for together.

*Decorate t-shirts with fabric paint

*Practice hula hooping

*Beginning embroidery - buy burlap, an embroidery hoop, a blunt sewing needle, and embroidery floss 

*Write letters 

*Catch lightning bugs
*Stay up late (every now and then) and study the night sky

*Weekly movie night - FINALLY get around to watching Up & Toy Story I.

*Set up a scavenger hunt with a map and hidden treasures

*Braves games

*Water balloon fight, running through sprinklers, and the Slip 'N Slide

*Write a song with the kids - piano and guitar

*Visit Daddy at work

*Camping (even backyard camping will do)

*Spend lots of time with Grandma, Granddad, aunts, uncles, and cousins at Lake Chatuge
*Take Jonny-boy fishing 

*Visit Cochran Mill Nature Center (20 miles south of Atlanta)

*Visit Noah's Ark Animal Rehabilitation Center

*Blueberry picking at Hard Labor Creek

*Hike up Arabia Mountain 

*See Martha Speaks at Atlanta Center for Puppetry Arts (July 19-31st)

*Visit Squire Boone Caverns, near Corydon, Indiana, while we're visiting the grandparents in Louisville.

*Meet Aunt Jessica at Aunt Helen and Uncle Jim's house in the corn fields of Indiana

I recently purchased an incredible book entitled Making Make-Believe, by MaryAnn F. Kohl and have gleaned all sorts of creative ideas for our summer vacation. I'm think my kids will be thrilled to make their own TV out of a cardboard box, crawl inside and host their own show; create a miniature garden in a pan with real plants, dirt, rocks and toys; make an edible goldfish container using jello, mandarin oranges, gummy worms, star fruit, etc.; build a sticky cracker cottage (much like a gingerbread house, but with graham crackers and peanut butter); and make our own purple mural, inspired by Harold and the Purple Crayon (one of Jonny's favorite books). The author also recommends setting up a play office, a flower shop, a carpenter's workshop, and my personal favorite: Let's Play Window Washer, because we all know how messy the house gets with everybody home 24-7. Hmmmm, how about let's play housekeeper, let's play masseuse, and then let's play naptime? Notice in the picture above how Jonny is being forced to play make-believe with his big sister dictating every single move.

my girl turns 7

If you're afraid of snakes, don't look down! 

Aunt Jessica, that means you.

Our girl turned 7 last week. S E V E N! We hired Mr. Greg's Reptile Roadshow to entertain her friends.

Lil channeled her inner-Bindi and had a ball with these scaly creatures.

Lil holding a milk snake

Nice bracelet!

Lil passing around a Blue-tongued Skink

This alligator was by far the scariest reptile in the program. Don't worry, there was no touching this guy.

A Mexican Gopher Snake

Lil is one brave kid.

The grande finale - a very large boa contrictor!

And six very happy girls.